Dear Children

Dear Children...
I would like to give you written notice on Reminders, Warnings and Promises of the things I will be doing or have done.

Reminders!
 I will always be the mom with the camera in my hand making you smile and pose, so just suck it up, and get it over with.


 Yes, I love babies. They love me back. If I have a goofy smile, it is because I just saw a baby. And NO this does not make me creepy.


 I don’t care if you are 21 and grown and taller than me, this 5’3 lady can still bend you over my knee. Or pinch you under the arm.


 You can never convince me that you are not the best at something. So, if you don’t want me to go off on you, than don’t put yourself down in front of me.


 When someone is being ugly to you, and you are telling me all about it, I may be smiling and understanding on the outside, but trust me the momma bear on the inside is ready to bring out the claws.


 Yes, you have favor with me, yes I think you are perfect and the most prettiest and handsome kids ever, I have no idea what everyone else’s problem is that don’t see it too.

Warnings!

 See first thru six bullets in Reminders, that will never change..

 Yes, I will be the annoying mom that attends all your games and ceremonies with my camera.. AND will be that grandma that goes to every sporting event, recital and award ceremony with my camera.


 Yes, I can be the mother in law from hell to your spouse, But as long as you are happy, and are loved, I promise to be the best mother in law ever.


 Yes, I will babysit your children, I won’t have to go far since I will be living with you. (lol)


 Yes, I will still make Sunday dinner for you to come over and visit me,


 You can never be too old to make me a home made card. EVER!


 I love the Holidays, but I will never make you feel stressed out or left out, if you cannot see me on that day.


 Honesty is my Best Policy

Promises!
 I am MOM and I love you! That will never change.


 My door and ear is always open.


 Honesty is my Best Policy..


 I will always be your biggest fan and cheerleader!

Love Always
Mom

Dearest Ciera...

Dearest My Ciera Nichole...
As Mother’s day is around the corner, I can’t help but think of the last 16 years as being your mom.
It has been a while that I don’t see you as that scrawny, 6 year old, clingy, chatty little girl.

We had to learn together how to make this crazy thing we call life work. But, because we both had big hearts and lots of love we made it work.

I watched you grow from being the only child, to being over taken with twin baby bubbas, that you adored and could not get enough of. You let them crawl all over you, and sneak into your bed in the middle of the night, and never complained. I admit, I was worried when we found out we were having Jazzy, cause I did not want you to not like her. But was tickled when you fell madly in love with her, and did not complain too much when she wanted to be under your feet 24/7. The fact that she acts and looks just like you makes me laugh. It’s like I am getting to raise you all over again. LORD HELP ME!!!

Than came the teen years and high school. Those were brutal, but I sure enjoyed watching you cheer and dance on those Friday Nights, and kind of enjoyed watching you grow to realize what friendship and boys were all about.

Ohhh, but I have to admit the years after high school were the ones that I learned that being on my knees praying, crying and begging God to be with you all the time were tough times. I knew you had to spread your wings and fly, I knew you had to be on your own, and date, and party, and get heart broken a few times. Yes, I butted in a few times, to warn you of certain people and their intention, and there were a couple of “I told you so” moments, but I knew that watching you Go thru tough times would be the only way for you to learn from your own mistakes and the ones of the people you cared about. So many sleepless nights of wondering if you were ok, if you were going to make it. Those times, were brutal on your momma’s heart.


But Ciera, look at you now.. I was jumping for joy when you came back home and decided it was time for college. And now you made it thru your first class, and you passed with flying colors. While working a full time job. I am just so proud of you..

And I will even admit that this fella who has stole your heart, and put that twinkle back in your eyes, has made me realize that maybe you have a clue of what you want in life.

I know that I have not been perfect. I know that I have been tough on you, and have pushed you.


But, I see you now, and it is nice to see that you finally believe in yourself, and you finally see that you deserve only the best. And you deserve to be happy and loved.


Your dad and I have always known what you were capable of. We always believed in you. And yes many days of being grounded and us showing frustration was part of that.


But, yesterday when you were my date to the boys’ banquet. And hearing you lecture your brothers, and going off on them about how they treat me.


Seeing you about to jump out of your seat to smack Aaron, when he was acting like he was raising his voice at me.
That moment right there melted my heart..

Thank you Ciera, for 16 wonderful years of being my daughter.


I love you more than you could even imagine..


Now, about those grandbabies…. =0)

Love Always
   Mom

HE IS FAITHFUL...

So, if you follow me on Face book, than you know that I was super excited about something last night. I got many text and emails about what I was so excited about. So, since I blog, I figured this was the best way to tell everyone about the great news.



As you all know, my boys are going to their very first mission trip this summer with our youth group. They are going to Canada. They are so excited, but momma here was thinking “No Freaking Way!” I had other family members telling me that I was crazy for letting them go. And to be honest, I had decided nope they are not going. Well, I attended a meeting and heard about the cost and who all was going, and I thought well I will pray about it. So that evening, I talked with God, and told him, that if this is what he wants the boys to do, than to give me complete peace, and have things line up perfectly for them to go. Two weeks later, the boys got their passports in the mail, and a family member wrote them a check to help cover the cost for spending money. And I was at complete peace, no fear of them going away to CANADA!.


The church held an auction, and they raised quite a bit of money to help pay for each youth member going. We were quite excited of the turn out and the generosity of our church members who were very giving. And Pastor Robert kept saying that he knew God was going to take care of it. So we put our faith with his, and just sat back to wait.


Yesterday, I stayed home with a nasty headache. I got a call from the Youth Pastor, telling me how much money each youth member got, and how much was due. Having two boys going, let’s just say we were looking at over 800 bucks to come up with in about 2 months. He told me that half was due this month, and the rest was due in June. I will admit, I thought to myself, there is just no way. But I told him, ok, we will figure it out. I got off the phone, and I shook my head, and thought, ok, so if we don’t pay this on time, and if I work some extra hours, and get Trav to work some over time, than maybe we can pull it off. And than I thought Nope, I am going to stand on my faith. So I talked to God again. I told him, ok Lord, you gave me peace, and you told me this is what you want the twins to do, so you know how much is needed, so take care of it. And that was it.


I took a nap, and went upon my daily business. Travis calls to check on me during his break.  I told him how much was needed and what was due. And he said ok, well we will see how to make it happen, he went back to work. He and I never talked about it again.. After Jasmine’s game last night about 8:30pm I get a phone call from our youth Pastor’s wife, and she tells me that they got a phone call from someone, who is paying for the rest of our boys trip. I was like are you serious?! She laughed and said YES! SO guess what!? Our Twins are going to Canada! God is good!

 And to the person who paid for our boys! Thank you, for sowing some great seed into our children. Trav and I pray blessings overflow you and your home above and beyond what you can imagine!!

Why I LOOOOVE him..

Sitting in bed last night, watching the Rangers game, and listening to my husband on the phone with one of his co workers. Jazzy girl crawls in the bed and on top of me and Trav and is trying to squeeze in between us. And Trav and I unite and don’t let her break us up.. Of course this starts a giggle fest that leads to tickles until we give up and she gets in between us. I watch as she cuddles up with her daddy. And I am reminded of what an amazing man I have married.
I am sure I have gone on and on about my kiddos and friends. But I don’t think I have ever went on and on about my husband. First of all, I know most of you will find this hard to believe, but I am not an easy person to be married to. I am spoiled, and stubborn, and can be known to throw a fit when I don’t get my way. Yes, Yes, I know, I know.. You all are in shock,.. So this is a compiled list of why I love and am blessed to call Trav my husband for over 15 years..

• For knocking me up with the most precious twin boys ever!! LOL

• For NOT running for the hills when you found out we were having TWINS!

• For never judging me or leaving me after he met my family.

• For working a full time job, and still coming home and waking up when his baby on his side of the bed woke up in the middle of the night

• For singing me the “Ant” song just to make me smile

• For forcing me to the dentist to get my cavities filled and holding my hand when I was terrified.

• For allowing me to stay up his butt the first 5 years of marriage when I could not get enough of him

• For working a full time job, and coming home and being Mr Mom to Ci and the boys while I went to college at night for 18 months. And NEVER complaining!

• For teaching me to drive and forcing me to get my drivers license!

• For Jazzy Girl..

• For working MANY horrible jobs with long hours, and dealing with crappy bosses, and not getting to see us but once a week, and never complaining..

• For going above and beyond to make sure your 4 kiddos know they are loved, and well taken care of.

• For teaching all of us, to have a sense of humor. And to learn to laugh at ourselves.

• For singing and dancing in the car, especially when the kids have company.

• For taking care of all the bills, so that I don’t have a worry in the world.

• For supporting my shoe fetish.

• For the many nights of cereal for dinner.

• For knowing how to comfort me.

• For pretending you are listening when I go on and on and on about how someone hurt my feelings.

• For always being able to cook, clean and do laundry WAY better than I could ever do.

• For not punching me in the face when I fight dirty.

• For thinking I am still pretty dang hot, even after I gained the 130 pounds!!!

• For always being my own Mr. Fixit, whether it was in the house, or my personal emotions.

• For Never getting jealous of my Romo Fetish..

• For knowing how to give me directions without using the “North, South” crap, and instead using Passed the” Wal-Mart and Kohl’s on your left.”

• For being a fine God Fearing, praying, loving man of God..

• For LOVING MEEEEE!!!!

• For not ever giving up on US or me or quitting when I was ready to throw in the towel.

• For showing me, that having a good attitude thru a crappy situation does pay off in the end…

It is because of Trav’s good attitude at his last job, that showed another person how great of a guy he was, that lead to him being called and offered a job that has him working days, and after only about 6 months, he is now the Boss and will be still working days, with Friday, Saturday, Sunday off..

Yep! My husband is pretty dang amazing… And this is why I LOOOOVE him..

They are WATCHING!!

Please keep your focus, as I let my mind explain what my thoughts have been lately...
A few months back, I heard a teaching that was taught on attitude. He made the comment on how our children act. He said that he looks at parents when they say “Gosh, I don’t know why my kid whines soooo much, it just drives meeee crazy!” And he wants to tell that parent, “umm I wonder where they get it from, hmm?” It kind of made me giggle, but than reminded me that these little people watch our every move. And they grow up to act like us, and pick up certain habits. Uh Oh!

My last blog I talked about my son, who got so down on himself, because he did not beat his personal best at the two mile at District. *(He did make his personal best at the 1 mile at District that following Thursday Toot Toot!!) Anyways, one of my dear honest friends commented about how he is acting like me with a low self esteem. Yeah that was an OUCH, but she is speaking truth. And I love her for that! I love my children; I am sure if you are a mom you love your babies and would do anything for them. Well, I am learning “THAT SOMETHING” has to include the way we act, talk and especially the way we treat people. If you lose your temper, cuss, gossip, lie or back out on plans you have made, than your kids will see that, and think it is ok to do too! If you put yourself down and constantly whine and complain, but don’t do anything to make it better, than your kids will do the same. I personally don’t want my kids to have the struggles I have had in life. I am far from perfect, but I don’t think it is ever too late to make changes NOW!

Those Little People that call you MOM and DAD, are watching and listening…
NEXT….


This morning on the way to work, I was annoyed with the way my kiddos had been acting the last couple of days, just fighting with each other, and complaining about their bodies. (Yes, I know, I know) Anyways, we were listening to the radio, about a young fella who just received a double lung transplant; they said before the transplant, that he could only say a couple of words before he had to gasp for his next breath.
He will be 15 next month. I turned the radio down, and I told the kids they really needed to realize just how blessed they are.
To be healthy enough to run the way they do and to not worry if they were going to be able to breath. They both just shook their head,..
It is stories like that, that have me Thanking God daily for healthy children. AND Thanking God for Amazing Medical Discoveries..

Good Enough...

Being a momma is one of the best things in my life. Have had the privilege of being in this role since I got married almost 16 years ago. Since Trav came with Ciera..

But when I gave birth to my twin fellas,.. When I heard their first cry, and held them for the first time, it hit me smack in the face.. That these two little precious boys were going to be my responsibility. To make sure they were cared for, loved beyond a shadow of a doubt, and that they always knew how special they are..
I realized they were going to depend on me for everything.
Oh, the joy these boys have brought into my life.

I will admit, the day the doc told us we were having twins, I cried. Lol I personally was not ready for one baby more less two of them at the same time.
But the good Lord always gave me the strength and the back up help to handle what ever came my way.

As everyone knows, my fellas are 15 now. And one of the toughest things for me as a mom is to not be able to make things all better for them. Yes, I am one of those moms, and I have gotten a lot better..
Well maybe just a tad bit.. Hee Hee
My boys are momma’s boys. And of course my husband rags on them for being that, even though he is a big momma’s boy too.
That’s right; there is nothing wrong with boys loving their momma.

One of my fellas.. (I won’t say which one) Is and always has been a “Go Getter”..
He loves to be the center of attention. From dancing, to telling jokes, to making VDO's
He will be the first to volunteer to be part of something. He always has gone out of his way to be the best at everything he could be. And I will even say he has succeeded in many areas.
Of course I have told him, he is good looking and smart, super funny and one day “The Ladies” will see him like good “boyfriend” material, instead of like ”brother” material.

But thanks to Pastor James and one of his teachings, he says I only say that because he has favor with me. Lol
Now of course he does have favor with me, and I will always be his biggest cheerleader.
But, as a mother, I find it heartbreaking to watch my child struggle with himself. To watch him be disappointed that he did not meet a big goal, or that he was not the best at something. I dislike seeing him discouraged.

They made Varsity this year as freshmen on the cross country and track team. They have been working so hard to meet their goals, and they both have passed what they wanted. Trav and I are so very proud of their hard work and dedication they have shown. But my fella acts like he was not good enough.
SERIOUSLY! They are running against Juniors, Sophomores and Seniors.
His best 2 mile run has been 11.33 His goal for the year was to beat 12.00
Someone please tell him, this is AMAZING!!!
At district yesterday, the guy who got first place on the JV team, ran a 12.30 something. If my boys had run with JV they would have gotten 1st and 2nd place. The boys’ coaches even told the boys how proud they were. One of the boys knew his time was not his best, but he was satisfied with his effort. But of course the other one was totally bummed out.

 This morning, I dropped him off at school, with no smile on his face. Which is very rare for him. I wanted to jump out of the car, and climb on the hood and tell him,..
I think he is amazing!  To cheer up! To put a smile on his face! To hold his head up high!
Because he has improved so much this year.
But, because he would have hated me for causing such a scene, I quietly drove away.
Sigh….
So blog followers and fellow moms.. This momma’s heart is heavy. How do I convince my son, that he did not let anyone down? That he is good enough. And that he cannot give up..

Randomness

Follow Along..

• We survived the 15th b-day party. We are officially parent’s to twin 15 year old Fellas, who are talking about driving now.. Wait?! What?!

• I find it amazing to see all these teens, you have watched grow up before your eyes.

• Jazzy girl and I, will be going round and round about what is appropriate shorts to wear. Mommy will win!


• Having to learn, to be a good listener, and keeping my “Momma Bear” instinct mouth shut. Even when I feel the need to punch someone in the face for making my baby cry! Yes, even if she is 22 years old!


• I am so very grateful for my job and my boss and the people I work with each day.


• I love emails and text! I don’t care if people think we are all doomed and will not know how to communicate in person.


• We went to The Winter Jam Concert last wkend. We saw Kari Jobe, Sanctus Real, & Skillet. We loved it!

• Around 1 year and a half ago, I was wearing a size 18-20 in clothes.. This wk, I got to buy size 10’s in my shorts!

• Around 1 year and a half ago, I started exercising with a group of ladies, we would walk 1 mile and I used to go home crying, cause I could not keep up, and my ankles would swell, and I was in pain. My Husband felt so bad for me, he bought me two ankle braces and encouraged me not to quit. Now, I not only walk 2 to 3 miles, but I also can do bleachers, and RUN the track.. Hard work pays off people!


• Was so excited that my baby brother and sis in law, let me take care of baby Gabe one evening as they went on their first date in a long while. He was such a good baby. I enjoy spoiling my nephews and nieces. I enjoy being a “Nana”..

• The kids and I are really loving Trav home with us each day. We used to go a week with out seeing him, and when he was home, he was so tired from the long hours he worked.. Now he is home by 5:30 each day, and gets 3 days off in a row. It is nice to finally have a normal family life, and to have help with the kids activities. He really enjoys being a daddy again, and coaching again. Only complaint, I don’t get away with cereal for dinner as often as I used to. Lol


• Mentioned a while back about a friend I had to learn to forgive. And how she moved back home, and we are close again, and she is my new work out buddy. I have to say, that God used one of the toughest times in my life and turned it around for good. I am thankful for healing of the heart and forgiveness. I love my sweet friends. I also learned “You really don’t know how good you got it, till you watch it walk away”..

• We are officially in softball mode. Jazzy got put on a team that we have played with before, we have so much fun with these girls, coaches and parents. Trav and muah and the fellas joined our church softball league. I am nervous, but so excited to be able to do this kind of family thing.

That’s all I got!
Thanks for reading all that Randomness…