For Such A Time As This..

It is Sunday evening. My mind is racing with thoughts. 

I have had to ask Jesus for peace and strength a lot this last week, more than normal. 

Not just for me but for my baby girl and our small Boyd Community.

If I am being completely honest, I find myself feeling guilty for being thankful that I have all my beautiful babies with me. That I have my husband. My Momma and Daddy..

I have been reminded that it can at any moment change.

This last weekend my baby attended two weddings and two funerals. 

How bittersweet...

This last week she has had to be so strong and hold the hand of a sweet young teenage girl from her youth group, as this young lady had to say goodbye to her big brother, someone just a little older than Jasmine’s brothers.

Jazzy and her classmates also mourn the loss of a fellow Senior girl. 

She was there to hug this young lady’s sweet momma.

Jasmine came home and talked to us and just kept saying, “It is not fair, she was so close to graduating” Trav and I were speechless. Because we agree it is not fair, and there just is no explanation. We may have even hugged our Senior just a little tighter that night. I told Jasmine that times like this is why she may have been called to be part of this youth group. To be strong and to show compassion for times like this.

This last couple of years Jazz has attended too many funerals, and some gave her some anxiety. 

A classmate who lost her precious baby, a one month old..

Than two of her close friends who went away to college only to have to come back to bury their father one year apart.

Jazz started to freak out and considered maybe not going away to college, in fear that she would lose one of her parents.

We quickly calmed those fears, and told her we would be just fine and she has to trust that her going away to college is what we would want no matter what.

Because we can’t stop living life because of the many “what ifs” and “fears”..

But, what motivation I hope it gives our small community to live each day to the fullest. 

To love with everything we have. To be more patient while driving. To go out of our way to be kind.

And may it encourage not only my baby but all our children. To make each day count.

 That when we are called to heaven one day, that we leave behind a "Hammett Legacy" that made a difference in the lives we leave behind.

So if you are reading my blog I ask that when you pray today, that you lift my Jazzy up in your prayers and her fellow classmates. These Seniors hold a special place in my heart, and they are limping along this wk.

Pray for peace, and for healing in their tender hearts. For their protection.. And for the parents and families of the ones who are grieving. May they feel the love of Jesus wrapping them up in his arms.

Thank you...

Run Baby Girl Run...

My eyes are leaking.. I am sure it is just allergies..😉

 Gah! I knew that Senior year would happen fast, but here we are at the end of  our last XC Season and I don’t think my heart is ready for all this. Ready or not though it is here!

Because all of sudden, it hit me that this little girl is about to run her last official District XC meet.

Tomorrow at 9am this baby girl is going to line up with her XC Team. They will do their little circle where they will gather to pray as a team, and then wait for the gun to sound off.

She will take off and run like the wind.

Only this time it will be different.

This time, she will be competing for everything she has worked for, she will run with all her heart and do her very best so her and her team can make it out of District.

Something she has hoped and prayed for since she was in 7^th grade.

7^th grade when she started competing as a XC runner.

The last 6 years have been an emotional roller coaster ride.

Many miles have been ran. Lots of sweat and tears have been shed.

Years of Dedication and Discipline.

Many times she has wanted to quit, many times it was her that talked herself into not giving up.

She loves running, she loves competing, and of course she loves winning and having the shiny medal to show for it.

But after surgery, and injury after injury it became tougher on her to keep competing at the level she wanted.

Two different doctors told her to stop. Told her she would not heal her pulled muscles if she did not stop.

But stubborn Jazz just kept saying “it is my Senior year” they finally have a team that is competing at a level to where they actually have a chance to make it to out of District.

So she keeps going.

Running thru the pain.

But like every meet, her dad and I will be there ready to catch her when she crosses that finish line.

We will be there cheering her on.

And no matter the outcome tomorrow.

We will be the proud parents of this little girl.

There will be more tears shed by me, as this season of cheering our babies on bright and early on the Saturday mornings comes to an end.

Oh what a Joy it has been..

So Run Baby Girl Run.. And hold your head high when you cross that finish line. You have lots to be proud of..

Well Done Babe.. Well Done..

Oh My Heart, Be Still...

So, It may have been a while since I have blogged about anything. 

And I can make excuses about how busy I have been and blah blah blah. 

But in all honesty my heart and mind has been in mourning..

Please stop reading right here if you are going to roll your eyes or judge me for being real...

You see I feel that all I know how to do is a be a momma, and if you ask me I think I am a pretty darn good one. Perfect? No, but pretty close. (sarcasm)

I read another blog the other day about a mom who dropped her baby off at college. 

It got me all in my feels.. She talked about the emotional struggles she dealt with. (Been there done that with my twin fellas)

How there are all kinds of books about what to expect when you are expecting. 

What to expect the first year,. How to books on potty training and books upon books of how to get thru the teen years and on and on. And I am not downplaying the teen years, I know they are brutal. (Oh Lordy those were some fun times)

But where are the how to books on how to allow your baby to go off into the cruel world alone?

How am I supposed to manage this last year of high school knowing it won’t be long before I have to let her go.?

When us mommas talk about how difficult Senior year is all we get is eye rolls and told they will be fine. Or that we are being dramatic. Oh Trust me, Jasmine could of moved out at age 5 and been completely fine on her own. 

And before you say it, I am very strong in my faith walk, I know my babies are protected.

But, someone tell me how to tell my heart that my momma days are coming to an end.

Someone tell me what I am supposed to do with myself.

You see I thrive off of being a momma.

I love it with everything in me.

I love cheering my babies on.

I love taking care of them, and making sure they have everything they need.

I love being able remind my Jazz to take her meds, and when she ask me to braid or straighten her hair before bed. To make sure she gets plenty of rest and eats or she will get hangry. 

To see her sweet face each day to just see she is ok. 

I love the little quick text I get thru out the day to let me know how her day is going or to tell me to get her food. Or how she is about to throat punch someone.

I love when she gets an off day so we get to do breakfast at Mels or a trip to El Paseo. Movie dates and shopping trips ( I am sure my hubby wont be too sad for those to end)

I love XC meets every Saturday and watching her cheer during Friday night lights and Pep rallies.

I love and treasure the early mornings when she will randomly crawl In the bed to watch Hallmark shows with me.

I love when she yells from her side of the house for me to come here, only to have her ask me to turn off her light because she is already comfy in her bed. 

These are my most treasured moments as a momma with my baby.

Yet, I am supposed to be jumping up and down to have an empty nest.? 

I am told that I should be rejoicing for all this free time I am gonna have.?

Umm, no. Not this Momma.. 

SO.. To my fellow Senior mommas, cry if ya wanna cry. Get all sentimental if ya want. 

Take lots of pictures and post and brag all over social media if that is what ya wanna do. 

But, If ya see me walking quickly away, know that I am trying not to embarrass my Jazzy by doing the ugly cry in front of her. 

Most of all I will be praying for US, We can do this.!

I am looking forward to the Many memories that will be made and shared. I am going to soak it all in.

Because it is gonna go fast, and next thing ya know we will be a blubbering mess as we drop them off at college.

P.S. Yes I know I will always be their momma. But having adult children is a whole other topic. 

Let me warn ya now.

Twenty One?!!

Umm People..

 Who let my Babies grow the heck up?..

How in the world are my itty bitty baby twin boys Twenty One?!

Oh how this Momma is so sad yet so proud and excited for these guys.

Yes I know, I am always bragging about them, and most are probably tired of hearing about how amazing I think they are.

But you have to understand that the odds against these Twin Fellas were pretty big.

You see 21 years ago I lied and told my doctor as I was in the hospital bed very pregnant that I was feeling fine, even though my lungs were filling with fluid from Toxemia. Couple hours later as I was gasping for air, my doctor came in and with a push of a button all these nurses came running in and hooking me up to all kinds of things and loaded me onto a helicopter for a nice ride downtown Fort Worth. The sonogram person had told me that these babies were too tiny and if they came now, they would have all kinds of issues. Which included not being able to breathe on their own. And learning disabilities all their life. Not to mention that Momma here for lying to the dr could have long term effects including seizures for the rest of my life or death. But I did not care, I wanted to keep them cooking a little longer, and I begged Trav to choose these babies over me.

BUT GOD!!!

This folks is when my Faith was tested and I learned that God answers heartfelt prayers. 

And how powerful a Mommas Prayers are!

These boys were born and the best thing a momma could hear was the sound of those sweet cries. 

Breathing on their own. 

Strong and Healthy.. 

Tiny but Mighty!

And the rest is History..

This is what a sleep deprived 18 year old mommy looks like.

Look at them now, about to complete their junior year of College in the top of their Acct Class.

They are kind, compassionate, good looking, and smart and know how to work a room.

And have the best bond as best friends then anyone I know.

Aaron and Cameron oh how your dad and I are so proud of you both. 

God sure poured on the Blessings when he allowed us to be your parents. 

Thank you both for being so good to us, for going easy on me and allowing me to mother yall so much. I pray this is the best year yet and that you reach and surpass all the goals before you.

Happy 21^st Birthday to my handsome Twin Fellas!!

Love Always

Momma

You Are My Sunshine.. My Only Sunshine..

Seventeen..
17...
My Itty Bitty Baby Girl is 17 years old today!!

This Momma's heart is aching yet so excited.
 It really is bittersweet..

 Aching because this next year I am going to be grasping on to every moment I have left with her as she will be starting her Senior year too soon.
 Taking many pictures because I know it will go by too fast. Doing the ugly snotty nose cry because it wont be long that she leaves for college..
 I am still adjusting, because year 16 came with a car, job and college courses, and we see less and less of her..

Yet excited because she has so many goals and plans. She is working so hard at school and kicking butt I might add, to get her ready for a sucessful career. Excited as she grows and learns about life and relationships. Heart broken as she had to learn how cruel people can be. Praying and hoping she dont allow her experiences this past year to break her joyful spirit. That she remembers whose she is. And how much she is loved..

 But this chick is fiesty and loves with all she has. She may fall down for a moment, but jumps up reminds people who she is. She is a precious daughter, a devoted and caring sister and the best Auntie Jazzy ever.
 So 17 please be kind to my sunshine..

 Jasmine.. Oh Jasmine.. my love for you grows and grows each day. From the time I held you in my arms I fell madly in love. What a pleasure it has been to watch you grow from an itty bitty baby to this grown beautiful young lady.

But go easy on your Momma. Let me soak up this time, as it is so precious to me. Let me annoy you with questions just a little longer. Let me enjoy our lunch dates and breakfast dates just a little longer. Dont get put out when my eyes get a little misty. Or when I want to take another picture. Let me snuggle some more. Let me be your duet partner in the car a little longer. Let me tell silly jokes that make you roll your eyes. This time is flying by babe, so give me some time..

I pray year 17 is the best one yet. That you make lasting friendships, that you meet all your personal goals that you set for this year. That you remember to be kind even when you dont have to be. Because that is how you were raised to be. That you always remember no matter what you are oh so loved. And your momma and daddy will always have your back..

You are my sunshine, My Only Sunshine..
Happy 17th Baby Girl..

A Very Hammett Christmas Over the Years..

The Holidays stress me out. 

They always have. I dislike that part about myself..

So what do I do when I stress out?

 I blog and share my heart and of course take a trip down memory lane with my pics.

When Trav and I started our own little family, we quickly learned that both sides of the families celebrate Thanksgiving and Christmas on the exact same days and time.

After a few years of running around with our little babies like chickens with our heads cut off we quickly learned we had to come up with a plan.

So we decided to switch it up each year and spend Thanksgiving with one side and Christmas Eve with the other.

Of course we would stop and visit with the other on Christmas Day. And switch it the next year. 

Over the last 20 years it has worked.

Not everyone was happy about it, but we had to do what was best for our little growing family.

But we both knew that as our family got older and started having a family of their own that things would change again.

I had a talk with one of my sister in laws a couple years ago and we talked about this.

How when it was that time we would go out of our way to do what is best for our own little families.

We said we would not add the stress of the holidays to our children.

Because let’s be honest, stress and anxiety sucks.

But they would come first.

We would be fair and if we had to move the days around we would just so that we know we get to see them each holiday.

 This Thanksgiving since Trav’s family held it later than normal, we had our first Official Hammett Thanksgiving at our house. We really enjoyed doing it and we have decided to continue that tradition.

And this year for Christmas, is the first year we have to officially share Ciera. And because it does not work with my side of the family it looks like we will get to have our first official Hammett Christmas at our house with all of our kiddos.

This new season has not been easy, but I think it will be a good beginning of the many things to come for our little growing family.

But what is most important to my heart, is that my children never feel left out or unloved. 

That yes, traditions are nice but being able to see everyone is what matters most to me.

  And as they each get married and have their own little families we will all work together to make it work.

Trav and I have tried our best to take what we liked and did not like about our childhood and instead of using it as an excuse to be jerks, we choose to learn from it and make it better for our children. We don’t ever claim to be perfect, we have made our mistakes, but we have learned and grown from them. 

That is why we have always been so involved with them growing up and playing sports etc. 

Cheering them on and traveling all over to support them..

We have been judged many times for this, but we have no regrets.

 It shaped our kiddos into awesome, kind, compassionate and successful young people.

Let’s be honest this world does not need more arseholes.

And we have made many memories for us. Some that we like to talk and laugh about.

And although Trav and I love our families dearly, and are there for them when we are needed.

We have also learned that there are some people who are near and dear to our hearts. That family is not only all about blood related people, but those that have chosen to celebrate life with us. The ones who were there at sporting events, BBQs, birthdays, awards ceremonies and who have come to meet and celebrate our first grandbaby.

 The ones who call on us for some family dinners with and without kids. 
Who have invited us into their homes for many fun get togethers. 

Those are the real examples of celebrating life with us. You know who you are. 
And we treasure those relationships greatly. 

So I say all this to say to my faithful blog readers.

To stop and think about the stress you are putting on your children over the holidays. 

Be fair and understanding and just love them and support them. Speak Life into them. Don't be in strife with them and cause them heartache. 

Let’s all try and remember the real meaning of what Christmas is.

Life is already hard out there in this cruel world. Don’t add to it. 

Thank you for reading my thoughts and for allowing me to share my heart. I pray that this ministers to you, and that you are able to have a Very Merry Christmas with the people you love.