They are WATCHING!!

Please keep your focus, as I let my mind explain what my thoughts have been lately...
A few months back, I heard a teaching that was taught on attitude. He made the comment on how our children act. He said that he looks at parents when they say “Gosh, I don’t know why my kid whines soooo much, it just drives meeee crazy!” And he wants to tell that parent, “umm I wonder where they get it from, hmm?” It kind of made me giggle, but than reminded me that these little people watch our every move. And they grow up to act like us, and pick up certain habits. Uh Oh!

My last blog I talked about my son, who got so down on himself, because he did not beat his personal best at the two mile at District. *(He did make his personal best at the 1 mile at District that following Thursday Toot Toot!!) Anyways, one of my dear honest friends commented about how he is acting like me with a low self esteem. Yeah that was an OUCH, but she is speaking truth. And I love her for that! I love my children; I am sure if you are a mom you love your babies and would do anything for them. Well, I am learning “THAT SOMETHING” has to include the way we act, talk and especially the way we treat people. If you lose your temper, cuss, gossip, lie or back out on plans you have made, than your kids will see that, and think it is ok to do too! If you put yourself down and constantly whine and complain, but don’t do anything to make it better, than your kids will do the same. I personally don’t want my kids to have the struggles I have had in life. I am far from perfect, but I don’t think it is ever too late to make changes NOW!

Those Little People that call you MOM and DAD, are watching and listening…
NEXT….


This morning on the way to work, I was annoyed with the way my kiddos had been acting the last couple of days, just fighting with each other, and complaining about their bodies. (Yes, I know, I know) Anyways, we were listening to the radio, about a young fella who just received a double lung transplant; they said before the transplant, that he could only say a couple of words before he had to gasp for his next breath.
He will be 15 next month. I turned the radio down, and I told the kids they really needed to realize just how blessed they are.
To be healthy enough to run the way they do and to not worry if they were going to be able to breath. They both just shook their head,..
It is stories like that, that have me Thanking God daily for healthy children. AND Thanking God for Amazing Medical Discoveries..

Good Enough...

Being a momma is one of the best things in my life. Have had the privilege of being in this role since I got married almost 16 years ago. Since Trav came with Ciera..

But when I gave birth to my twin fellas,.. When I heard their first cry, and held them for the first time, it hit me smack in the face.. That these two little precious boys were going to be my responsibility. To make sure they were cared for, loved beyond a shadow of a doubt, and that they always knew how special they are..
I realized they were going to depend on me for everything.
Oh, the joy these boys have brought into my life.

I will admit, the day the doc told us we were having twins, I cried. Lol I personally was not ready for one baby more less two of them at the same time.
But the good Lord always gave me the strength and the back up help to handle what ever came my way.

As everyone knows, my fellas are 15 now. And one of the toughest things for me as a mom is to not be able to make things all better for them. Yes, I am one of those moms, and I have gotten a lot better..
Well maybe just a tad bit.. Hee Hee
My boys are momma’s boys. And of course my husband rags on them for being that, even though he is a big momma’s boy too.
That’s right; there is nothing wrong with boys loving their momma.

One of my fellas.. (I won’t say which one) Is and always has been a “Go Getter”..
He loves to be the center of attention. From dancing, to telling jokes, to making VDO's
He will be the first to volunteer to be part of something. He always has gone out of his way to be the best at everything he could be. And I will even say he has succeeded in many areas.
Of course I have told him, he is good looking and smart, super funny and one day “The Ladies” will see him like good “boyfriend” material, instead of like ”brother” material.

But thanks to Pastor James and one of his teachings, he says I only say that because he has favor with me. Lol
Now of course he does have favor with me, and I will always be his biggest cheerleader.
But, as a mother, I find it heartbreaking to watch my child struggle with himself. To watch him be disappointed that he did not meet a big goal, or that he was not the best at something. I dislike seeing him discouraged.

They made Varsity this year as freshmen on the cross country and track team. They have been working so hard to meet their goals, and they both have passed what they wanted. Trav and I are so very proud of their hard work and dedication they have shown. But my fella acts like he was not good enough.
SERIOUSLY! They are running against Juniors, Sophomores and Seniors.
His best 2 mile run has been 11.33 His goal for the year was to beat 12.00
Someone please tell him, this is AMAZING!!!
At district yesterday, the guy who got first place on the JV team, ran a 12.30 something. If my boys had run with JV they would have gotten 1st and 2nd place. The boys’ coaches even told the boys how proud they were. One of the boys knew his time was not his best, but he was satisfied with his effort. But of course the other one was totally bummed out.

 This morning, I dropped him off at school, with no smile on his face. Which is very rare for him. I wanted to jump out of the car, and climb on the hood and tell him,..
I think he is amazing!  To cheer up! To put a smile on his face! To hold his head up high!
Because he has improved so much this year.
But, because he would have hated me for causing such a scene, I quietly drove away.
Sigh….
So blog followers and fellow moms.. This momma’s heart is heavy. How do I convince my son, that he did not let anyone down? That he is good enough. And that he cannot give up..

Randomness

Follow Along..

• We survived the 15th b-day party. We are officially parent’s to twin 15 year old Fellas, who are talking about driving now.. Wait?! What?!

• I find it amazing to see all these teens, you have watched grow up before your eyes.

• Jazzy girl and I, will be going round and round about what is appropriate shorts to wear. Mommy will win!


• Having to learn, to be a good listener, and keeping my “Momma Bear” instinct mouth shut. Even when I feel the need to punch someone in the face for making my baby cry! Yes, even if she is 22 years old!


• I am so very grateful for my job and my boss and the people I work with each day.


• I love emails and text! I don’t care if people think we are all doomed and will not know how to communicate in person.


• We went to The Winter Jam Concert last wkend. We saw Kari Jobe, Sanctus Real, & Skillet. We loved it!

• Around 1 year and a half ago, I was wearing a size 18-20 in clothes.. This wk, I got to buy size 10’s in my shorts!

• Around 1 year and a half ago, I started exercising with a group of ladies, we would walk 1 mile and I used to go home crying, cause I could not keep up, and my ankles would swell, and I was in pain. My Husband felt so bad for me, he bought me two ankle braces and encouraged me not to quit. Now, I not only walk 2 to 3 miles, but I also can do bleachers, and RUN the track.. Hard work pays off people!


• Was so excited that my baby brother and sis in law, let me take care of baby Gabe one evening as they went on their first date in a long while. He was such a good baby. I enjoy spoiling my nephews and nieces. I enjoy being a “Nana”..

• The kids and I are really loving Trav home with us each day. We used to go a week with out seeing him, and when he was home, he was so tired from the long hours he worked.. Now he is home by 5:30 each day, and gets 3 days off in a row. It is nice to finally have a normal family life, and to have help with the kids activities. He really enjoys being a daddy again, and coaching again. Only complaint, I don’t get away with cereal for dinner as often as I used to. Lol


• Mentioned a while back about a friend I had to learn to forgive. And how she moved back home, and we are close again, and she is my new work out buddy. I have to say, that God used one of the toughest times in my life and turned it around for good. I am thankful for healing of the heart and forgiveness. I love my sweet friends. I also learned “You really don’t know how good you got it, till you watch it walk away”..

• We are officially in softball mode. Jazzy got put on a team that we have played with before, we have so much fun with these girls, coaches and parents. Trav and muah and the fellas joined our church softball league. I am nervous, but so excited to be able to do this kind of family thing.

That’s all I got!
Thanks for reading all that Randomness…

Happy 15th Birthday Twin Fellas!

My handsome, smart, funny, loving Twin A and Twin B are 15 years old today..
I could go on and on about how much fun they have been, how proud we are of them, and how fast they have grown.
 I can let everyone know how big of a boob bag I have been about them turning 15!

But, I say let the pictures tell the story..

In the Beginning...

So Aaron & Cameron.. Happy Birthday!

We love you, and look forward to watching you accomplish the desires of your heart.

Finish Strong! Finish Well!

Freshmen Fellas who made varsity



Aaron



Cameron



15 Years of Pure Joy, Lots of Laughter, and Lots of Love..

Love Always

Mom

Let's K.I.S.S

Keep
It
Simple
Smarty (Really it is supposed to say STUPID, but I dont like that word)

Have you ever watched babies & toddlers play? If you could spend a day watching them play, I think we adults could learn a few things. We as adults (ME) spend so much time worrying over the silliest things. What does “So & So” think?
What did “So & So” say about me?
Does “So & So” even like me?
What if I say something wrong and “So & So” Rejects me.?


But, in the life of the precious little people, they are just so confident, and full of love and acceptance. When they see you and you just smile at them, or say their name. They get a big ole grin. When they complete the task of taking their first bite of baby food, or a puzzle or sing a song, and you clap for them and tell them GOOD JOB! They smile and clap for themselves too. When you tell them they have pretty shoes (cool for boys) they smile and tell you who bought it for them. They say Thank you when you hand them juice and gold fish. When they play outside, they run after each other, and they don’t care how the other toddlers are dressed, or if they have the latest I Pad 7000.... When their friend falls off the slide, they stop what they are doing and say “Oh No!” and run to help them up. Some even suggest a kiss or band aid for their boo boo. They keep it so simple. They show compassion!


So quit thinking so much! Have a toddler’s heart. Be excited for everyone’s accomplishments. Show appreciation for every little and big thing that is done for you. When your friend falls down in life, be there to help them up. Most of all, Smile and Learn to Love Everyone.. Even those "So & So's"
Let’s Learn to K.I.S.S…

Happy Birthday Grandpa!

Wow! It will be 3 months this Saturday since my Grandpa received his healing, as he entered into Heaven.. March 17th 2012 my Grandpa would have celebrated his 72nd birthday! He loved his birthday! He loved everyone’s birthdays. He would walk around the house singing “Happy Birthday to meee!”..

This will be our families first time not to have him here to celebrate.
Gosh how we miss him so much! I miss his voice..
He would call me on the phone, and leave me a voice mail, He would say “Hey Mija, this is your GRAAANDPAAA, and I am fixin to cook some meat, so come eat”!

I miss his laugh! He was always laughing,.. I think the hardest thing for me, has been seeing my grandma, and looking behind her to see where my grandpa is. Cause they were always together.. Like I forget that he is not here with us anymore. She misses her best friend. But she has really amazed us, with how well she has been doing. Still Smiling..

To be honest, I was dreading his birthday coming up, I figured the family would be sad, and we would tip toe around the fact that it is my grandpa’s birthday. But, my little brother Jess had a great idea. He has invited the family over to his house for a cook out on the 17th, we are going to celebrate my grandpa’s birthday the way he would have loved to do it. Lots of food, Lots of Family, Lots of laughs! I know my grandpa is smiling up in Heaven and proud of his precious grandson Jessie for thinking of him like this. Darn that Jessie, he was always the favorite grand kid, guess he will still hold that Title!



Happy 72nd Birthday Grandpa..

OHHH Baby!!

I am a female.. I over think everything.. My mind is going non stop all the time.. Usually I can get over myself, and move on to think of something new.. But lately, my mind and heart is staying on one particular thing. A Baby! I want a baby.. The thought sends my husband running for the hills. He already made it very clear, that if I “get” another baby, he is filing for divorce. How RUDE!! Of course there are babies around me every where.. From my sweet friend who has Baby Gracie, to my handsome little nephew Gabe, and let’s not forget that I actually have the honor of playing with all the little bitty people in the church nursery. You would think between all of them, I would get my baby fix. But it is not working.
 I STILL want to adopt an infant.


* (Please Excuse the following Rant for a minute)
Had a conversation with some of my friends the other day about this. Talking about how hard and expensive it is to adopt babies, toddlers and children. But yet there are so many precious babies out there that are being neglected, and have never experienced what real love for them should be. They are living in Foster Homes, or Orphanage, or even worse, living with their parent who only has them to get that monthly paycheck. These precious little people being mistreated, and harmed, and killed. (Side note: NO I don’t think all foster homes or orphanages are horrible) And we wonder why kids grow up to be insecure and hateful. When all they really need is to be loved. I am not questioning God; I know he loves all the precious little people. But, I know so many couples, who have been married for years, and have a nice home, and have been trying for years to have a baby, but cant.. Yet, there are many couples or single ladies, who don’t even want a baby, and get PG, and than get rid of it like nothing. Like it was an inconvenience.. It is something I cannot wrap my mind around..

Back to me…

So anyways, I have asked God to show me, why my heart and mind is on this baby thing lately. And it all became clear.. Besides the fact that I just LOVE babies.

In less than 10 days my handsome twin babies are going to be 15 years old..In 3 months they will be going on their first missions trip to CANADA! In a matter of a year, they will be driving, dating, and spending less time at home. In less than 3 years they are going to graduate from High School, and go off to college! A part of me is super excited to see them grow, and to see how God will use them.

But than a part of me, is screaming NOOOOOO!!


Someone push pause, this is happening way too soon.!! I sware it was just last month, that we went to Ciera’s open house in 2nd grade with my babies in their stroller.


Or was it yesterday that we were doing the happy dance cause they went peepee in the potty!? Oh how I love being a mommy. And oh how my heart aches, to know that one day my house will be quiet. There will be no “MOM, I am hungry!” or “MOM, the boys peed on the toilet seat!” or “MOM, tell Cam to let me play the X Box too!”.. No more late night basketball, baseball/softball games, no cross country meets, or track meets to freeze at. No more half time shows to watch the cheerleading.


Oh Sweet Jesus! What will I do with myself?!