That " Long Confusing Rambling" Post

Bare with me as I process and share my own thoughts..

Daily life keeps us moving and grooving.

Thru out the day I randomly check my social media. At the end of the day when I am winding down I scroll thru to see how my people are doing.

Last Week FB gave me tired head.

My emotions were up and down as I read thru some post.

People are hurting and they all react differently.

I saw hateful post.

I saw where people went back and forth at each other for all to see.

I saw where people were posting pics that should not be shared. "Ewe"

I saw prayer request.

I saw your normal daily life post..

Thankfully I saw a couple of encouraging post.

I finally logged off with a heavy heart.

SIGH...

I wish I had the answer to help everyone.

I wish I was a better friend.

I do have great intentions..

I have a great desire to reach out and be more social, to love the broken.

But I have to admit I have found myself enjoying the comfort of my bubble in my own home.

People are just too mean and wishy washy.

 I do not and should not have to guess what your intentions are.

But we say one thing and do something completely different.

Personally for me, I am my own biggest critic and enemy.

 I do my best to match my actions with my words.

But I fail daily. I never claim to be perfect. 

We have to realize though, that everyone is different. And how you handle life is not how others do it.

How you handle your anxiety, depression and fears is not for everyone. And yes we all struggle. 

But it don’t make what others do as wrong either. 

“Unless of course you are turning to illegal drugs and alcohol to numb your pain”

For me I have found that when I have the focus on myself. 

When I have the “Me Me Me” Mentality, is when I feel the saddest and totally down in the pit of depression.

When we are constantly thinking of ourselves, and how we feel, and how someone made us feel and why someone has nothing to do with us or why we feel so alone etc.. Or guessing how someone feels about us. It brings me great anxiety. 

But yet we don’t make the effort to reach out to others who we know are hurting.

When I have mentally  judged and prosecuted what people think of me on my own, and they have no clue.

I feel that communication could save so much heartache. 

If people have a problem with you and go to everyone but you to discuss it, than it causes more harm to you than good.

I have had people whom have vented to me about someone who hurt them, and then I see them on FB being all lovey dovey with that person.

It makes me question what they say about me behind my back.

But then I have to remind myself how someone feels and thinks and says about me is none of my business.

I can only control how I act and react towards those people.

If us Ladies would spend more time being there for each other, encouraging each other, and I mean actually doing something like picking up that phone, sending a text or anything to reach out to the ones we say we care about and love.  I feel so many could handle life much easier than we do now.

But again, I see why we don’t.

We have been judged and rejected too many times that it still is tender to put ourselves out there.

Someone I love dearly who I admire had an incident a while back. 

There was some talk, and she wanted to avoid drama so she went to that person and asked “hey I was told you said this about me, I was hoping we could move pass all that and stay friends” That person although should be given credit for being honest, replied with “I am sorry, I just don’t like you. I have tried but I just don’t like you and I don’t know why”

Now let me tell you my friend laughed it off. She was like “Oh well, I tried”.

If this had been me, I would of cried myself to sleep that day and woken up with a migraine the next day. I cannot even process that kind of a response.

And we wonder why we have so many who are depressed and becoming unsocial.

Again people are just cruel. And I wish I could figure a way to help.

But it starts at home people. And with Jesus. Lots and lots of Sweet Jesus..

Last but not least.. 

Here lately I have been told the story over and over, so there must be a reason.

But it is about Moses and him holding the staff “rod” up during a battle, and his friends Aaron and Hur saw that he was getting tired and his arms would start to fall so they rushed to him and held his arms up to support him.

 And it just speaks measures.. 

Who are your Aaron and Hur? Who are your they? 

Do they know how much you appreciate them?

If we see our "Loved Ones" and our “Friends” struggling with life. 

We should want to run to them and help them. We should take the focus off ourselves and help them.

And it won’t take long to realize, that helping others makes you feel so much better. 

Wow! If we could all have that mentality. What a difference this world would be.

But I guess I would need to leave my bubble long enough.

Maybe tomorrow I will do better.?