His Precious Peace and Promises

A few months ago, I was worrying so  much that it was making me sick. 

Literally sick. 

I was having horrible nightmares each night that I spent most of my day in tears as I thought of every possible scenario that could happen to my Twins when they left for college.

When I would pour my heart out on fb or to my friends, family, I was met with strange looks and people telling me to basically get over it.

Because I am not the first mom to send her children away to college.

But for me personally it was really giving me severe anxiety. I did not want to get back on my Anxiety meds, I wanted to push thru and feel normal again. I wanted to trust in God like I have been doing all this time.

But apparently I thought that his protection ends when my kids go off to college.! (umm no)

The ladies at my church were invited to this Women’s Conference. I was able to attend and I loved how they ministered to my heart and soul. On just the things that women struggle with daily. At the end of the meetings they held prayer. My precious pastor’s wife turned around and asked me if I needed to go up for prayer. Of course I wanted to, just did not want to go up there alone. So she literally took my hand and walked up there with me. While we waited for my turn, Karin put her arm around me and just started praying. She was being sensitive to the holy spirit and everything that came out of her mouth was what I was struggling with. 

From fear, to feeling alone, my failures, to what people thought of me, to my marriage and the friendships I had lost and wanted back so badly.

 After her sweet prayers I felt this big sense of peace come over me like I had never experience before. 

By the time it was my turn for prayer and I told the guest speaker what I was struggling with, I was already at peace. But when she told me that now more than ever my twins needed me, she caught my attention. She said there was no time to be in fear about them. That now more than ever I needed to stand in faith for them. 

That hit me hard right in the face. 

I went home that night with a lot to think and pray about.

 I have had many conversations with God, about the plans he has for them. I have prayed over my twins and the choices they will make once they leave the nest. I have prayed over the friendships that will be made and the professors they will have. I have thanked God already for putting this plan together for them, and how he will be there every step of the way. And of course for their protection over them wherever they go.

Ever since that day, the peace that I have over me concerning them leaving me has been precious.

Does not mean the tears have stopped though. My tears are for my sadness because I will miss them like crazy. I will miss having a house full of teens. Will miss the way they make me laugh. I will even miss hearing them fight with Jasmine.

And I am reminded how fast high school went for the twins and how even though my Jazzy is starting her freshman year it won’t be long till she is going away to college.

It makes me think of my own momma and how she must of struggled when we left her house. Although I felt she was thrilled to have peace and quiet after we all left.

My Twins will be 6 ½ hours away from me. With the freedom I now have on my wkends I plan to visit them on occasion. And Trav said I get to go to some of their cross country meets. I look forward to that new season in my life. I know that God is going to watch over them, and provide for us financially so that they can go to college there all 4 years.

Now I share this with yall, because I know several mommas out there that are struggling with their babies leaving. I know you are wondering what in the world you are going to do without them. I know your heart aches because you have spent the last 18 years chasing and supporting everything they have done. 

So I am praying for you. 

I am praying that peace overtakes you right now. 

That even though we will miss them like crazy, we will be ok. 

That our hearts are healed. 

That we can sleep each night with no worrying over them.

I pray that in the upcoming months you find friendships that have been neglected.

And that your marriages thrive more than ever. 

That we find this new season is the best one yet..

Now, I know a little special someone who leaves for AFRICA for a year this coming wkend. 

I am going to have a sad 18 year old fella as he says goodbye to his sweet girlfriend. I admire and look up to her momma, and so I ask that yall agree with us in prayer for this person and her precious momma and family. That she has safe travels, and has the time of her life. And that she comes back in a year with lots to share. 

We are super proud of you Sarah. You will be missed greatly!

Suck It Up Buttercup...

It seems the word “Changes, Changes, Changes” keeps coming up for me lately.. 

Come August I am going to be experiencing lots of new changes in my life. 

And I am planning on praying my way thru it.

They made the announcement on Sunday during church service about one of the things that is coming up. So now I can share with everyone!

 First of all, thank you to ones who text to check on me or the ones who stopped by the nursery on Sunday.. I appreciate you thinking of me, and the support I have gotten from each of you while I was doing the Nursery thing. Your kind words meant the world to me..

So those who know me well, know that for the last 7 years or so I have been in the nursery. The last almost 5 years I got to help run the Nursery with the Children’s’ Pastors.

At the beginning of June I was told that my position was going away and that the Youth Pastor’s wife was going to oversee the Nursery Dept and create a core group of ladies to do what I was doing.

So that it was not all on one person.

Now I wish I could say I jumped up with excitement when I was told the news.

I am telling on myself here, being brutally honest..

I cried,.. I cried for 2 days..

Poor Pastor who had to watch my melt down.

I went thru different emotions.. I was shocked as I never saw it coming. I felt like I was not appreciated.. Like my faithfulness and hard work was not noticed.. I was sad, because I loved what I got to do each Sunday..

Than I was just pissed..

Again not a proud moment, and I failed completely if this was a test..

BUT…. after much prayer and seeking council from my sweet and precious friend.. I asked God to help me see the big picture in all this. And to minister to my heart what he wanted me to do next.

 And he did just that!

First thing I had to realize it was nothing about ME!! It’s about the Little People.. 

So once I got my focus back and got over myself.. I am happy and excited about what is in store.

I have been asked a few times, so I will answer it on here.. 

 YES, I will still volunteer in the nursery on occasion. 

 YES, I still get to be part of helping with the nursery with a great group of ladies.

The little people are going to love the new curriculum that was finally purchased, and I think the parents will love it too. The core group of ladies have a great heart and love the little people just like I do. So yes, changes are coming, but they will all be great changes..

But I wanted to take the time to give a shout out to a few people..

First to my hubby and children. They were so happy when they heard the news.. lol apparently me being over the nurseries was not always glorious for them..

Thank you guys for helping me wash and fold the many t-shirts, and blankets and spit up rags. Thank you for going to church, sometimes 2 hours before service without complaining while you ate your breakfast in the nursery classes. Thank you for understanding that our wkends were cut short because we had to be up bright and early every single Sunday.. And thank you for being patient as I spent time texting all wkend to find replacements for the classes each wkend. I know you did it because you love me, and you knew that I loved serving the Little People..

Second to the many ladies and gentlemen who showed up each month to volunteer in the classes. To those who had to help me out twice a month. Or those who had to help me out on a moment’s notice. Thank you for your faithfulness and for serving and loving the Little People. It's because of people like each of you that I was able to do what I did successfully.

And to my blog readers who attend our church or a different one.
 If you have a little one in the nursery, or a grandbaby in that nursery. Please ask how you can help do your part. I feel the nursery area is the hardest one to fill. But if everyone did their part, than it would only have to be once every 2 or 3 months. And it keeps people who do it over and over each month from getting burnt out.

So there it is.. My heart on the matter.. The good the bad and the ugly.. 

These nursery changes take place August 1^st, We move my fellas into their dorms August 8^th, and My Jazzy girl starts her freshman year towards the end of August, and Travis goes a way for a bit for training in August also. ( I think he planned that on purpose) I am going to take a long and much needed break in August, so no worries if you don't see me much. 

When I think about all the changes coming I have a strong desire to just hide under a rock.. And since that is not an option for me, I am having to put my big girl panties on and take it all one day at a time.

So keep me and my familia in your prayers please. And let’s see what all is in store for us in this next season.